Having your world turned upside down

Ninety three years ago ma was born in a small village - and she never left. For 69 years ma has lived at the same address. Till now. Till her world was turned upside down. 

Who is ma?

Ma is my bonus mother in law. I am married to her son in law. The man who was widowed when her daughter died. He kept in touch, as did ma. After a few years he and I met and subsequently married. I am now ma's daughter in law. For the past 20 years we have grown very close and I care deeply for her wellbeing and she for mine. Although not family, she shows interest in my children and grandchildren. She is always thrilled for me when I visit them for longish stretches, she is always very happy to see me return.

On my last visit to New Zealand, the undesired happened. Ma had a brain haemorrhage and was quite ill for some time. Oh the shock and emotions I felt. I was half a world away. So sad and worrying. Ma being ma, she rallied. She is made of tough stuff is ma. Has had her share of challenges and gets up to fight another day. Rehab took some time. From a dynamic, independent and self efficient woman - to now dependent on many for her care. Thankfully ma's personality, clearheaded thinking and will power means she can still participate in the world today keeping up with the news, the events around her and the stories her family and those who care for her, tell. She's mastered the art of a wheelchair. At ma's age, the number of friends around her have dwindled dramatically. Those able, visited faithfully giving her some diversion in the long days at the rehab facility.

Times have changed. Many years ago if one needed care, the choice was yours for the making. To stay in one's own town or place of birth was a natural choice and very understandable. In today's world with the 'greying' population increasing and the facilities not able to meet the demand, where one 'ends up' is not always of one's choosing. And so it is with ma. She has been allocated very comfortable, spacious accommodation with caring staff in a lovely part of the landscape- but not her landscape. Too far for the elderly friends to 'pop in'. Not in her own surroundings and loved place far from the home she lived in for 69 years. It hurts. It hurts her, it hurts her family and it hurts me.

I understand that ma is crushed. Not because the place isn't to her liking, not because she thinks the staff aren't good to her - but in ma's words, " I feel cut off from my world". Will ma find peace with her new situation? Will she ever feel 'at home'? Will there be a possibility eventually that a place closer to her home becomes available? Will she then be physically able to make the move back? So many questions.

I am pleased ma is out the rehab facility - it was a medical situation and ma didn't need that sort of care. It was to tide her over till somewhere was found. I am pleased it is a light, airy, spacious space with a nice sunny position and opportunity to even sit outside. The staff I have met are lovely caring and dedicated people. The service ma gets is great meeting every need - except 'her' people. Her past, her memories. Anyway, I am hopeful that one way or another ma will feel more at ease once she settles in more. Should a place become available in 'her' town, we will cross that possibility when and if it happens. Right now this is what it is and we will support ma in lots of ways to make it bearable and maybe even enjoyable. For now, there isn't anything we can do but be supportive, understanding and loving.

So proud of you ma.

Be good.      Be Kind.           Keep smiling. 

It's all in the planning, the excitement is mounting.

 A clear blue sky, the sun is doing it's best to send warmth on this chilly February Monday. Another month draws to a close in 2023. Is it just me or are the days shorter than last year? Just kidding - well sort of. I somehow feel that I achieve less per day this year than I did last. Why is that? I know in all reasoning that this is ridiculous. There are still 24 hours in the day and seven days in a week. Maybe it's because it is February and there are only 28 days, making the reality of another month dawning just that much sooner than I anticipated. Who knows? I won't go on about it - just thought I'd 'throw it in the group' letting you ponder should you feel so inclined. It is Monday after all! 🤣

This time last year our spring holidays were taking shape quite nicely thank you. We do plan to be away again the month of May this year, and finally yesterday we took the first step to make sure we commit and continue our research and plan accordingly. We are aware of the possibilities, the possible limitations and the age we are, that we need to take and make opportunities when they present themselves. As I mentioned: Time is of the essence! Exciting stuff. I can almost get the feeling the holiday has started - the preparation being part and parcel of the whole experience.

Our last 'big' trip, Re-tour de France, was a great success and I guess we will be measuring this one against it. Despite that being quite unfair. Different country, different rules, different expectations. It would be like comparing apples with oranges. Couldn't make myself say pears - so traditional! 😂

It will again be a road trip. My flying experience of September and December are still a vivid memory and long distance flights enough without wanting to find myself being catapulted once again into that open air space. Keeping the feet ( and rubber) firmly on the ground. I am looking forward to the driving part. More challenges I am sure. Nice thing is when traveling in one's own car, it is comfortable and reliable. I know its quirks. Rentals are an enigma, the unknown quantity. 🚘

Right now we are looking for our second stop, a place to lay our heads to rest and working out for how many days. There is so much to see, explore and enjoy. No, I am not going to disclose the destination just yet. Keeping it exciting. 🪙

So thank you February for being a not too wild a winter month. I'm enjoying the longer daylight hours and the new buds on the trees, the pristine snowflakes and bright crocuses bobbing their delicate heads above the ground. Winter hasn't left the building yet, I am aware of that. Anything can stil happen to make it want to stay and gather strength. We have had no snow to really speak of so that's still very possible. Still, no use conjuring up the whims of Mother Nature. What will be will be. 

🏖️ 🌋 ☔️ ☃️

Should you wish to enjoy some spring from your armchair, here is the link to the:

Playlist of our French get-away!

Till next time

Be Good                    Be Kind                  Keep smiling

World events and other stuff!

As I mentioned in my last blog about a book I was just starting to read, I had to put it down and let it rest a while. Then finally, I plucked up my Dutch Courage, and read on. The book was called, " The Sisters of Auschwitz," by Yvonne van Ieperen. It exposed a darker side of our (my) country's history. Nothing to be proud of. I know, I know, it is all explainable, sometimes even justifiable, but betrayal in my eyes is unforgivable. Easy for me to say in 2023, in my warm home, comfy chair at my desk in my Woman Cave, where the only 'bang' noises I hear is from fireworks the youth so desperately want to let off!

That's the thing and also the theme of today's world. Hindsight can be more of a hindrance than help, whilst I like to think, we need hindsight so we can use the events to learn and adapt our handling during situations which overwhelm us. Not to use to brow beat the past and point fingers, looking for someone to blame.

If I look back on my life's path there are many decisions that I could have made differently. There would still have been a action-reaction, only different. I will never know how different. My imagination could - but that's neither here nor there. 

Recent cyclone weather has hit mostly the North Island of New Zealand. Loss of life. Millions, maybe even billions of dollars in damage, and as the saying goes, " it ain't over yet!". More rain and high damaging winds are on the way. People have been urged to have a minimum of 3 days food and water at the ready. 

In Ukraine the war still rages, as it does in so many countries. In Turkey and Syria death and destruction. With Syria being doubly hit with the conflicts there making bringing aid there difficult. What a tragedy. Too big for words. Drought, hunger greed and animosity. When will the proverbial penny drop?

What a tragic situation we humans are in. We cannot seem to find the recipe for peace and co-operation. Of humanism and altruism. I can imagine people despairing. Of wondering whether it is worth staying around for what seems like more unrest, disaster and sadness.

I am not a pessimist. I firmly believe there is a way. Not a way back, because that is paved with all what is wrong with today's world. But a way forward. To scrutinize the past, admit the bad judgement calls and walk together. We CAN do this. It isn't hard. Let go of wanting to be the best! The first! The mightiest! Stop imposing values YOU alone respect and allow for diversity and uniqueness. Everyone has something to offer. We all count.

It is funny, when I started writing I had such another 'path' I was going to follow. I've let my fingers do the walking of the keyboard. What I do want to add, and then I will rest my fingers, is:

I am 'white', blond going grey, a female, catholic, have social justice as my focus, adopted the verse from Micah ( 8:6) many many years ago as my mantra, make mistakes, am aware of my shortcomings and am sitting at my 'typewriter' so maybe I could be called a " Social Media Cowboy (girl)" shooting from the hip. I am aware if I was to join the conversation about issues I will be judged on that and labelled accordingly. So many thoughts I have a filtered, unsaid and unwritten. Freedom of thought, speech and ideals are no longer free. That makes me sad! 

On a lighter note, as I said, I am not a pessimist, the aid being offered from around the world to grief stricken areas gives me hope, the many organizations which set about helping people in need are many, the realization we need to do something to change our way of life in regard to the environment is being seen as more and more urgent and accepted as a responsibility by all.

Don't just be kind to the neighbor but be kind to the whole neighborhood. And as a friend of mine says at the end of all her videos: "Do something kind for the world today!"

Live Justly

Love tenderly, 

and walk humbly with your God.

Micah 8:6

Be Good.              Be kind.          Keep smiling

Oeps, I skipped December

 "Time flies when you are having fun", or so the saying goes. So I must have been having so much fun in December I didn't have time for my blog. Truth is, I had time, I just didn't have the energy. In fact, I had plenty to write about, only it were all sort of irritations, Moaning Mini items which were a result of world or local news events, happenings in and around the area or just wet, dark and dismal weather influences. Stuff happens!

So here I am on the 11th of January and it's the start of another year in which time will continue to fly. The weather isn't what it used to be this time of year. Not sure whether winter will re-appear after only having been around for about 10 days early December. Maybe it won't be back at all or it won't start till spring. One of the things I am still grateful for is that there isn't a weather dial, well I tell myself there isn't one, so that humans decide on what the weather might be today or tomorrow. Although we do have an effect on the weather by the way we have treated Mother Earth all these years. But that's another moan.

I'm an early riser. In the summer that's quite a different experience than in the winter months where it's dark till after 8am. At the 'height' of winter it is even dark till 9-ish. That makes for a different experience than in summer, where I can sit on the balcony with my morning coffee and welcome the day. It does however, give me more time each day to get things done. I watch videos on YouTube I've subscribed to, there is ample time to chat with friends in different time zones and I get to read the paper and do the crossword - hot of the press so to speak all before 9am when our pensioner life gets going! As we live in an apartment I get to walk downstairs and back up thus bagging the first bit of exercise for the day. A great mini work out, we live on the third floor and there are 54 steps to descend and then climb. My iWatch is pleased with me. 

Having met my commitments to my subscribed channels I then have time to work on my own videos. Editing takes quite some concentration and dedication. The software is great but not without flaws and instabilities. Occasionally after saving my hard work only to find upon resuming the task that the files have miraculously 'gone missing' whilst I haven't done a thing to cause this. So it's back to the drawing board. These days I find myself at my desk working furiously to get the video out in a day. Once converted I am safe. Phew, neck strain, backache but a sense of achievement is soothing ointment for my wellbeing. 

And so I trundle on. I visit my bonus mother in law twice a week, I do the grocery shopping before everyone wakes. Done and dusted by 8:30- I love going early when it is quiet and spacious in the supermarket. No trolley bashing. I try to get a decent walk in each day - though the motivation is sometimes lacking. We may not have the weather we usually do but rain is not a fun weather type to walk in and certainly not to bike in. My bike will be hybernating till spring I am afraid. There is a book I am slowly getting deeper and deeper into, The Sisters of Auschwitz by Yvonne van Ieperen. Heavy reading due to the topic but fascinating at the same time. 

Plans for a break away are in the offing. Last year France was our Valhalla ( check the videos here) This year we have somewhere else in mind, plans follow in a future blog when the plan has taken more shape. 

A few invites noted in the diary and a few dinner parties in the pipeline. The year is shaping up to be quite enjoyable, Now I'd be thrilled with a large win in the lottery as there are some projects I'd like to support both near and far. 

So, 2023, I'll do my best to be a regular spiller of thoughts, frustrations and ideas. Hope the year pans out the way you, my reader, wants it to. Blessings and strengths to you all.

Be GOOD                            Be KIND                          Be HAPPY

Done and dusted

 Where did all those weeks disappear to?

I had from the 1st of September, the day I boarded my flight to Auckland New Zealand, till the 1 December, when I would board my flight back to Schiphol, Netherlands. That's 3 whole months. And I look on my watch to see, it is 30th November. I know, I hear you! Every day has 24 hours. None dropped a few by the wayside. I used them all. And used them well I may add. Now they are, all but one,  used up. 

This truly was a fantastic reunion with my family. Some I saw more than others. That's understandable due to the changes in their lives these past 3+1/2 years I was absent. Not by choice but by the situation which affected every country across the globe these past few years.

Unexpected events, planned moments, a flight to Australia. It all happened and I can tick many boxes. So I'll share a few with you, because I am just abuzz with memories made such a short time ago.

My trip over and arrival went almost without a hitch. A fog at Dubai rearranged the stopover somewhat but never fear, we left a tad later and still managed to arrive on time in Auckland. Thankfully my luggage arrived with me so that was a stress less. I have had that experience before and it isn't a comfortable one.

I was met at the airport by my good and dear friend Annette. My partner in crime ( traveler and mischief maker). Annette had booked a motel for the evening so I could catch up on some sleep, be rested before arriving at my son and daughter in law's home. The 4 children were obviously excited - as was pregnant mum, as she was due any time with the baby. Which transpired only a few days after my arrival. On 6th September my grandson was born on his dad's 40th birthday. If that wasn't joy enough, my son and daughter in law from Australia turned up at the door, totally unknown to both my son and me. What a reunion.

In the weeks that followed lots happened which only made even more special that I had arrived when I had. Mum and baby both had health issues. First one, then the other. I was able to pitch in and keep the washing machine turning and the meals arriving on the table. Including obviously all the other chores that come with running a household with 4+1 and an unwell mum and including a concerned father/son.

A short escape to Waikanae to my only surviving uncle ( dad's brother) and his wife ( my cousin on mum's side). They are both 84 and live in a lovely small care community, independent and very much surrounded by lovely nature. I loved meeting up with them and on my last evening their son who came for a few days stay. Hadn't met up with him for too many years to remember. This was a real treat. 

Dear friends came up from Napier, stayed with their daughter and family while we managed to spend time together. Normally I would drive down and visit various friends there but the nature of my stay was so different this time, I didn't move far out of Hamilton to be fair. Except for....

A flight to Melbourne Australia saw me reunited with my son and family ( the one who popped over for the 40th birthday and baby birth). I stayed 17 days in all of which I spend 4 nights staying with my grandson and his partner. We had some great times and lovely outings.

With the festive season around the corner, I introduced the grandchildren to Sinterklaas. It was fun. Then the morning of the day I was to leave for Annette's we had 'presents day' which caused a lot of hilarity fun and noise. Just fantastic. 

So you see why I think time just flew....I haven't even scratched the surface of the daily happenings...and this already sounds like a hectic but valuable time. My photo supply has increased- I have some gorgeous kiddie shots and from the trip to Waikanae and here at Annette and Mike's. I've got enough to edit for a few videos. All in good time.

Now it are the last happenings, dinner, soak in the hot tub, pack the cabin bag tomorrow and leave for the airport. Then, 

Time and I will fly......

Be good.          Be kind.         Keep smiling

A quick glance back - then move forward.

 A flash back- nothing wrong with looking back, albeit it just a glance. I stumbled on a writing from way back. Thought I would share- just because I can! Nice glance - now moving forward! I'll reveal and explain my new challenge soon. 

Link to my first blog

In 2012 I started blogging. It was just prior to my 60th birthday. My idea was, to write a wee something each day in my 60th year. Logging 356 days to look back on.  The opportunity to look back on 'a year well done.' A milestone reached.

It was a too big a task. I managed 81 'stories' in that first year. It would be my highest contributions ever on this blog. I was keen to learn. What works for me may not work for others. Do I care whether 80 or 801 people read my blog? My highest reader count is 1469, I was honoured, my least read is 22. The topic wasn't interesting enough I gather. But for me, something I can look back on and recall those moments I found important enough to write about. I'm happy if someone has gained anything at all by reading about my thoughts. I write to empty my head, to discover more about myself and to have this as a record of 'who I was' at the time of writing. In all honesty I can say that I've learnt as I went along. My 'opinions' or beliefs have continued to develop, adjusted themselves due to new insights and some have been confirmed over the years.

I maintain- that one is never to old to learn. And not just new things but also new thinking.

I started sorting my subjects into categories. I am bilingual, my children wouldn't be able to read my dutch blog which I started on the 17th July 2012. Writing, or blogging to be exact, kept me sharp in both languages. Being bi-lingual does mean one has to use both languages to practice the grammer. It is important to me that I keep up my English to be able to communicate with ease with my children, grandchildren and other family and friends. My native tongue, Dutch, is part of who I am, so being more than just capable of expressing myself is also imperative. It keep the cogs spinning.

As I said, one is never too old to learn.

My status as 'oma' provided another soapbox. Since 2015 I also write bi-lingually, about my life as oma. It keeps me on my toes, separates the topics I write about and also explains the reason why my annual contributions to each blog is limited. If I was to add them up, I'd be quite surprised. I don't write for the numbers, but to jot down events, thoughts and opinions that roam in my head. Some manage to end up being processed on my keyboard.

Juggling writing session in my daily and weekly schedule is a challenge- one is never too old to learn.

So I felt ready for another challenge. I've always loved photography on a amateur level. My computer groans under the weight of shots- many which are 'delete-able' and it's a job I've started tackling because I need to make space for my next learning curve.

In February last year ( 2018) I posted my first video on YouTube. Oooooh, was a nerve racking thing that was too. But I persevered and have learnt heaps since that day. Another challenge, another growth spurt and at 65+ glad I am able to challenge my grey matter into a new way of thinking. Not only am I able to express myself in word- I can now leave behind something more adventurous for my children and grandchildren. I'm still discovering new things, scared to try some others, apprehensive about tackling big projects- and enjoying the comments, images and adventures I've now committed visually to 'film' and embarked on this new adventure.


It is 2019 - I recall the moment our calendar changed from 1999 to 2000. It seems like only months ago. Life is 'Like an Hour Glass' with the sands of time spilling away so quickly. I want to make sure I fill the time I have with discovering new challenges and precious experiences.

One is never too old to learn. My opa used to say, "when my time is up I'll be able to sleep for as long as I like, for now, I'll keep busy doing whatever I can".

Great outlook, it obviously made an impression on me, as I was only very young when he died. I too will 'soldier on' and hopefully be inspired to keep challenging myself and continue to believe- one is never too old to learn.

Changes can be eye openers!

World wide fuel prices are being affected. Gas, power, coal. The snowball effect is that food prices have risen. Cost of living rose along with it.  Wages haven't. Post pandemic the world seems to have fallen into a slump even though the dramatic death tolls have ceased, yes people still die, they always did and always will. Name any illness and some will not survive it. Wars keep raging, dissatisfaction reigns as does greed and animosity. Where is all this coming from? Or has it never been away since Adam and Eve and their curiosity for wanting more?

Today I wanted to write something cheery, then I saw the news about Poland being struck by a 'stray' missile? Was it Russia, was it the Ukraine? Was it a provoking action? Or a genuine 'wrong co-ordinates' from a stressed young soldier? Sigh....deep breath!

I am led to believe the fuel price situation is because of the war between Russia and the Ukraine. I am led to believe the shortage of staff in all sectors of society is due to the pandemic. 

And then there is the climate issue. Farmers appear to be the biggest target in many countries, including clean green New Zealand. 

Back to the pollution: Cows emit gas. Just look around you. Cars emit fumes, chimneys smoke. Factories pollute the air with their waste burn off. Not to mention lighting pollution at night- buildings are like Christmas trees with every light imaginable burning for no reason except that they can. Maybe I should care less?

I can't fix wars, I can't change the fuel and price crisis. In fact I can't fix any of the issues above - though I do have a responsibility as a human being to do whatever I can to promote and uphold human dignity, respect, love and compassion. I just wonder how to do this effectively. 

So I look for ways I can contribute to a better world. I avoid conflict by trying to be accepting, a peacemaker where possible and avoid conflicting situations. Offer a listening ear, a shoulder and smile and hug.

Pollution takes many forms. Yes I just flew half way across the world. To see my children and grandchildren. Until someone can "Beam me up Scotty" I'll continue to fly - so I need to take counter actions. How? By using my bike rather than car, by walking more, by cooking efficiently saving power. Recycling. Every little bit helps. We eat little meat, occasional fish and regularly vegetarian. A varied diet is healthier than a fad diet. Wearing thermal wear inside to save putting the heating up high. Walking a healthy circuit daily to keep my body in shape warding off illness needing medical care. There are so many ways one can make a difference, to one's circumstance both health wise and financially.

I read an article a few days ago in which people were interviewed how they are coping with increases in food and fuel prices. How they are managing to re-assess necessities against extras. The thing I noticed was people were choosing to go without or reducing their spending not on essentials but on extras.. Less monthly magazines ( most are online these days anyway - saves paper)! Going out for dinner less often. Opting for one car ownership instead of two. Reducing extra channels on tv. I got the feeling people with more financial means had been interviewed. Life is hard for those barely making ends meet. Where are their stories?

Maybe there is a family in your (my) street who could use a free meal every week. Cook something for that family- make contact, care, share! One way of making this world more habitable and caring is to reach out to our neighbor. Especially the ones we haven't met yet. 

Anyway, I just thought I'd get this off my chest, reset my caring clock and be more aware of how I can make a difference. Onward and upward to a more beautiful world.

Be good.       Be kind.         Keep smiling.