Arms to hug and hold me.

 May 2019 - my last hug and glimpse of my dearest darling children en grandchildren.

2020: My trip on hold: Who would have thought the world would change so dramatically in such a short space in time.

2022: Finally:  Arms to hold me, hugs to give

I've lived back  in the country of my birth from 1 July 2000. In that time I have flown back to my second home,  to Aotearoa/ New Zealand and Australia on average every 15 months, till 2019 that is.  My planned trip for the end of 2020 was put on hold. Not only because of Corona but also due to the restricted access one had to a much desired entry ticket to get into Aotearoa/New Zealand. The government had closed its doors to keep its people safe and operated a sort of lucky dip for those needing/wanting to go home. I didn't participate. Left the space I might take up for those with even more pressing needs. This doesn't make me a saint, just felt uncomfortable in case I got 'lucky' and someone needing to be with their dying parent, wedding or birth event lost out. And I've not even mentioned to huge costs of the quarantine hotels.

The virus hasn't gone but the immediate danger, the heaviness of the pandemic has subsided. Yes, one can still become very ill. Some may even not survive but most will. Thankful for the vaccination available is all I can say. After purchasing my ticket, which due to the fuel costs and other related reasons why had risen dramatically,  and applying for my Traveler's Declaration now required before entry I am now able to fly to hug and hold once again. I have NEVER been away from my children for this length of time. It was hard. Emotionally I coped, only just, having the support of many around me who helpen me through dark periods. I am so grateful for these support groups. Reading about more pressing and devastatingly sad cases I felt guilty at times about my own misery. Grateful too was I that there were no serious issues why I might have felt the pressing desire and need to be with my children. Great disasters were spared us. Many were not that fortunate.

So, looking forward and with renewed joy in my heart I am preparing to venture across the miles, different rules, new airport as I am taking an airline new to me. I believe masks will be required all the way: all 24-26 hours roughly which it will take to reach my destination. That'll be a challenge. At the end of that: 

arms which will embrace me. And that's the moment I yearn for. 

Be good - be kind - keep smiling.

Keeping in touch from a distance

Do you have family living overseas? Or are you fortunate to have them in the same country, in the same town even?

Mid 1961 my parents took the plunge and we emigrated from the Netherlands to New Zealand. Due to health issues with my baby brother we returned to the Netherlands early 1967.

Unsettled, family in fits and starts back to New Zealand by mid 1971.

Seesaw immigrants you could say.

In 2000 I returned to the Netherlands on my own. My 28 year marriage had stranded, my children were of adult age and forging their own paths. One son had moved over to Australia in 1997 where he created his own family.

So you could say, we are scattered hither and yon. Each living their lives in the manner personally designed. This is my 21st year back in the Netherlands. It has brought me happiness and pain. Being this far removed from the children en growing grandchildren hasn't been all plain sailing but it hasn't all been terrible either. My main goal was- visit every 18 months, more if possible, less if the needs ( financial) must.

This past year has been a true trial. I haven't been able to even plan a trip let alone make one. I've got the presents. Purchasing the odd thing along the way. They sat and stared at me, pleading to be given and used. I have had to put them in the cupboard. Can't bear to look at them. I want to hand them over myself. See their faces when they open their gift. There is an option to post/ship a box full for everyone. I may have to resort to that.

To fill some of the void, I have written a couple of short stories and had the books printed via a photo album site. I may tape myself reading them and send the file. Had other ideas. Bedtime moment ideas. Those will have to wait.

I have been making videos ( I am an amateur) on YouTube, showing off the places I go to. Teaching them more about this country of their fore-fathers and mothers. Sharing my life in a small way. Another way to reach out instead of being able to tell the tales and describe the events. It fills the time, as I am then totally focussed on them. It feels like I'm visiting. It is one way of creating 'visits'. I especially love the cooking videos, thinking that maybe one day, they may use these recipes themselves.

The videos aren't as personal as you would think. That's because I know other family and friends watch them. I also created a cook book for some of the younger grandchildren with some recipes I use regularly. I have another one on the way for the older grandchildren. A bit more elaborate. Oh how I would love to provide them personally with meals and cakes. This is the next best thing. I love it when I'm told they have used the cookbook or have watched a video.

It's not like we are online every day, all the time. Lives are being lived. School, events, friends, work, time out, time in. Not to mention the juggling the clock and time difference. I think we have a healthy relationship in which we allow each other to share what they choose. It is normal for them and me, to continue to live our life to suit our situation. By doing some of the wee extra things I hope to maintain a bond which in turn brings our lives a little closer.

There is nothing more special that spending time together, even when you are apart. There are so many ways in which one can do that these days. Sadly my grandparents in 1961 didn't have any of the options we have today. I am hopeful for the future. For my next possible visit. I do my best to stay healthy and fit and am grateful for the fact that my family Down Under is safe and well. That is the most precious thing of all.

Klein(e)kinderen worden groot - My, how they've grown!

Maart 2000 werd in Australië mijn kleinzoon Max geboren. Samen met zijn twee oudere broers vormde zij een mooi gezin.
In december 2004 werd mijn dochter, oudste van 3, moeder en daar volgenden nog twee kleintjes om het gezin kompleet te maken. De afstand tussen Nederland en Nieuw Zeeland + Australië is te overbruggen- als je maar zorgt dat je spaarpotje steeds weer bijgevuld kan worden. In de jaren '50-'70 was het ondenkbaar door om de zoveel jaar een reisje naar 'het thuisland' te maken. Daar is wel veel verandering in gekomen. Ik heb moeite met de mensen die roepen dat we niet met vliegtuigen op vakantie zouden mogen- vanwege de vervuiling. Nou 'roepers' dan zou ik mijn kleinkinderen nooit leren kennen of zien. En dat is dan wederzijds- zij mij dus ook niet!

Mijn jongste zoon is nu ook vader van 3 met nog eentje op komst. Ik verheug mij er zo op, bij het volgende bezoek, om weer zo'n bundle vreugde in mijn armen te kunnen sluiten. Ik heb geen datum en het spaarpotje is behoorlijk aangesproken vanwege het bezoek van mijn kleinzoon Max. Daar was het potje ook voor hoor, daar niet van.  Het bericht van de aankomst van nog een kindje kwam tussen het bezoek door. Nu maar zorgen dat ik weer alle zeilen bijzet om een bezoek waar te kunnen maken. Sparen kan ik wel.


Tegenwoordig heb ik leuk persoonlijk contact met een paar kleinkinderen die nu wat ouder zijn. Op Instagram of via emails en FaceTime kunnen zij mij nu berichtjes sturen, gesprekken voeren en op de hoogte blijven houden van het reilen en zeilen met bv hun schoolervaringen. Ze zijn niet afhankelijk van de aandacht en tijd van hun ouders hiervoor. Wat een verschil met vroeger. Een telefoontje die geboekt moest worden, de 'slecht bericht' telegrammen, een luchtpostvel met alle mogelijke millimeters volgeschreven. Natuurlijk blijven de slechte berichten moeilijk, maar ik moet zeggen, dat het elkaar aan kunnen kijken, praten  met tranen, toch meer een gevoel van nabijheid geeft. Bruiloften en andere gebeurtenissen bij te kunnen wonen via satelliet beelden of 'live' via andere media mogelijkheden. Een heel gewin voor diegene die elders ter wereld hun thuisbasis maken.

Ik zie de groei in de kleintjes, ik merk hun vorderingen in het leerproces en groei in hun woordenschat. Wat gaat dat snel. Nu, bij aankomst, zijn wij geen vreemden voor elkaar. De live beelden helpen om zelfs bij de jongste telg, een vorm van herkenning. Al ben ik OmaFArAway, toch zijn wij wel heel dicht bij elkaar. En nu ik ook YouTube videos online zet- volgen ook zij meer mijn leven hier in Nederland en vinden dat prachtig. Wat zijn er toch veel mogelijkheden om ons leven met elkaar te delen. Het is de moeite waard om op de hoogte te blijven van alle mogelijkheden en ermee bekend en vertrouwd mee te raken.


Wil je ook meegenieten van de reisjes met Max: Amsterdam -  Rotterdam  - Parijs  - Berlijn   - Giethoorn  en nog veel meer! Klik op de namen van de plekken die jij ook wil bezoeken.

In March 2000, my grandson Max was born, in Shepparton Australia. That's the one who just had 8 weeks here in Nederland with me. A GREAT time was had by all. Now the family counted 3 sons. I was oma and loved it.

By 2009 the number of grandchildren had reached 6 and a few years later my youngest son and his partner added another 3 to the ranks. Before the year is out, number 10 will have announced 'itself' adding to my 'oma joy!'Now this new event has also spurred me on to be even more frugal and committed to re-filling the sock under the mattress. I obviously will want to hug and hold this new addition to the family. In the early immigration years of the 60's-'70's it was unthinkable to travel back on a regular basis to one's 'homeland of old'. Let alone that family members could come over and see where their family members had made their new home. That is different today. I don't get to go every year- but do try to fit a trip in every 2 years. The children grow so fast. While they are little I would so love to be part of their developmental years.

There are so many ways in which contact an be made these days. emails instead of Airmail, FaceTime or Skype instead of phone calls, and even being able to attend special occasions via live connections via Internet. Unthought of in my childhood. And due to the possibilities, I get to see my grandchildren grow, to follow more closely their path to maturity. Keeping tabs on school progress and hobby activities.

It works both ways. I blog and now- a-days, vlog ( make videos for online) and in this way make it possible for the kids to see what OmaFArAway gets up to. They get to travel the countryside, to meet some of my friends. The technology is there and I find it a challenge to keep abreast of the possibilities. Great to keep that mind active and alert. Also getting compliments for the grandchildren who think their OmaFarAway is 'cool!' All I can say is, " what a wonderful world of opportunities we live in."


Want to see all the places I visited with Max? Just click on the name places above in the 'dutch' section! There is lots to see.